give thanks.

Thanksgiving is here once again! It's is a day we give thanks to all those blessings in our life. Today I woke up and made a list of what I am thankful for and there are too many things to just make a list. So here we go.. Over the years, I have truly realized that everything happens for a reason. I am thankful for my parents. We have definitely been tested with some trials over the past four years, and they have stayed strong through it all. But because of everything that has happened, we are all stronger people because of it. I am thankful for my sister and my brother, whom I can undoubtedly call my best friends. I am thankful for all of my extended family, and that we have such a close bond with eachother. I love them all so much! I am thankful for the entire Waller family (my second family). I love them with my whole heart and am so thankful that they are in my life. They have taken me in as their own and I know that we are always there for each other. I am thankful for all of my best and closest friends. Without them I would be a lost little girl in this world. I am thankful for Morgan Merideth and her amazing example in my life. She was there in the most vital time in a young girls life. She taught me respect, courage, how to hold myself with class, and most importantly how to be confident in myself. I'm thankful for the wonderful opportunity I have this year to follow in her footsteps with my amazing Accadians. They will never understand how much love I have for them.  Thankful for my house, my car & my education. Also the little things in life; hot summer days, good music, hot cocoa, hersheys hugs, cozy socks, and many many more. I am extremely thankful for my health and that I can dance limitlessly. But most of all, more than anything, I am thankful for Astra Lauren Waller. She has taught me how to live. The most important thing in this life. I know she is here with me everyday, but I cannot wait til I see her again! Her legacy lives on through all of us, and she will never be forgotten. To sum it all up, I am just a lucky lucky girl in this world. I've grown so much as a person and learned a great deal about myself. To not take anything or anyone for granted, to appreciate the little things, to tell people that you love them, and most importantly to not let those that are important to you slip through the cracks. Life is too short! I love you all sooo much and thank you for everything!! Happy Thanksgiving. Now go feast!

little bird.

Astra Lauren Waller. July 27, 1991 - October 22, 2011

Dear Stra,

Words cannot express how much you mean to me. I miss you so much already, things just aren't the same without you here. You inspired me more than you will ever know. You fought stra. You fought every day for 20 years. That's not easy, but you always made it look easy. No matter how tired or sick you felt, you were always up for going out to have a good time. I'll never forget the memories we made, and the laughs we shared. You have helped me through so much in my life and I can never repay you for that. No matter what was going on with you, you were always there to give me advice and make sure I was okay. You always have held a special place in my heart, ever since the first day I met you. 

Our love for dance is something we shared. And you were amazing. When we would finish a dance in practice I would be completely out of breath feeling like I was ready to collapse, then I would just look at you and suddenly it didn't matter how out of breath I was. Because I knew your struggle was 100 times worse than I. You kept me going Stra. I danced for you. I'll always remember the 2009 state competition. We came off the floor and I was crying because you were having such a hard time breathing. We had to carry you through the hallway and give you so much oxygen and you were still turning blue. I honestly have no idea how you did it. To this day I cannot fathom the strength you have inside of you.

You are an inspiration to my whole family. When my mom had cancer, or my dad lost his eyesight, somehow you always came up in conversation. That no matter what you're going through, somebody somewhere has it worse off than you, and makes it look 10 times easier. You did just that. You and Jamie were always there asking how I was, or what you could do to help. When I found out about my grandma earlier this year, I was on my way to the hospy to see you. I just remember you asked how I was and I just broke down in tears. I stayed until 1 in the morning just having you hold me while I cried. My dad especially held a special place for you in his heart. He would constantly say "Wow she is just an amazing girl." But anyone that knew you knows that that just isn't enough to describe you. Your love for life and your sweet smile inspired others, and I know I will use that for the rest of my life. 

I'll never forget all the hospy visits. Ordering pizza, watching Bachelorette (which there is absolutely no talking during), making bracelets, painting nails, watching the sunset, or even sneaking off the grounds. We have had some amazing memories I will cherish for the rest of my life. I am so grateful for having you in my life, and being able to call you a best friend. You have changed my life forever and you will never ever be forgotten. I know you are in heaven with the big guy just loving life. You must have loved taking that first deep breath for the first time. No meds, no machines, no coughing, no oxygen. Just you and your perfectly healthy lungs. So go run, jump, and dance your heart out Stra.

You better love all the surprises we have for you today. Just wait till you see what your family and friends have done in your honor. My heart is broken, and there is a hole there now, but I know you have been with us these past few days. My eyes are swollen and raw, but the tears are there because you have been such a great part of my life. All of my tears are for us down here, because I know you are a happy girl dancing with the angels. Oh strubber, you would have loved last night, all of us together because of you. It truly was a happy moment to see everyone come together to help celebrate your life. Because that's what you would want, a celebration. And tonight, we will give that to you. I love you forever Astra Lauren. 

"It's never goodbye, because goodbye means going away, and going away means forgetting."

I'll see you soon baby girl. Forever in my heart.

Love,  Megan "hendy"

in the newss.....

I'm baaaaaack!

Feels great :)

But for real, things have gotten crazy. So many changes over the past few months. 

a. Summer 2011 was thee best by far. I learned so much about who I am, who my friends are, and where I'm going in this crazy thing called life. I had some unforgettable memories with friends and family. I took LOADS of pictures. If you're lucky, you might just get to see some. Had adventures, vacations, and of course worked my a off all summer long. But it's all paying off in the end! Happy thoughts...

Pics from the Summmahhhh!

Every Tuesday this summer I went swimming with Cyd & Sam.

Camille. Most amazing friend out there!

Crazy night with Molly & Kim. Love them!

LOVE this girl with my whole heart.

We went gubing up at the farm. Gubing = tubing + golashes.

All the cousins!

classic family reunion pic.

Went to the Alpine slides in PC with Nat, Cyd & Sam!

Mo, Karl, me & Ame at Timmy. There he is -------------->

 

Camping!

At the horse races, watching my Baby Charlie race!

Whit, Camille & Karly. What can I say? Most amazing beautiful women in my life.

Love my girls!

b. I'm a drill coach! Can you believe it? Yeah... me neither. It's honestly the best thing in my life right now. I live and breathe for dancing. To be able to share that with 26 beautiful girls is the greatest gift I could ever give or receive. Chelsea and I have accepted the challenge and are taking this year by storm. 2011-2012 Brighton Accadians will be.. I repeat.. WILL BE the best they have ever been. This year is going down in the books. But truly, it is the most humbling, inspiring thing I have done thus far, and cannot wait to see what the year brings!

Accadians 2011-2012

Jay & I took a trip to St. Jeezy! Funnest trip EVER.

c. I miss my best friend. He is my rock & I'm a different person when I'm with him. But alas, he decided to be amazing at basketball and get a scholarship to play at CWC. So while he's off in Wyoming living his dream, I'm wishing he was here! Things are definitely not the same without him. He practically lived at my house, lets be honest. But I am SO incredibly happy for him, and just look forward to when I get to see him again. Christmas break? Let's hope before then. 

 

d. School........... ugh here's the sit-chu. I'm taking this semester off from University of Utah. It's halfway willing, halfway unwilling. But I don't think I would have been able to manage everything I have going right now. So I guess everything happens for a reason! But on the up side, Brian started school! My cute father is attending SLCC to get his degree in electrical engineering. He is the cutest! I help him with math, and we have study sessions. He is the smartest person I know (and I'm not just saying that. If you met him you would think so too). He's my hero though. Without a doubt. Come January we'll be hitting the books together! Can't wait!

e. I'm dreading winter. Who wants to wake up 15 minutes early so they can put on snow boots and mittens, go scrape their car (because sommmebodyy wont let them park in the garage) and pray to the lord they you don't slip on ice or that there isn't a wreck on the freeway? Sounds like so much fun if you ask me!! 

f. Update on family.... Britt & Keith are a cute, in love type of couple. But hey they are married, along with that comes stress. Anyone reading this, wait as long as you can until you get married! If you already are, more power to ya! Mom is great though. Ever since she got this new cookbook, she has become an avid chef. She makes amazing meals and desserts constantly, and hey I am not complaining! Lil bro is just a stud. He'll always have ladies chasing after him no matter what he does. But nonetheless, he is growing up and learning what it means to care about school and family, rather than just 'hanging out' and 'being cool'. He definitely holds a special place in my heart. Grams is cancer free!!! WHOO! She finished chemo this summer, and her hair is even starting to grow back. TALK ABOUT A LIVING HERO. The rest of the fam is all great and happy. Love them all to death! Eric is in marine training down in Cali. He graduates on Oct. 14th and will be coming home for a week before he heads out again! We've been writing lots of letters and I'm so proud of him!

Eric the marine:) powwwdaaaaaa.

That's all the news I have for now. Also, I need to get on here more often. That would be a great thing.

Here is my little inspiring bit for the day.

"Ain't it amazing that struggle tends to bring out the best in who you are? It's the irony of life. Without struggle and without the means of going through something, you would never really know how powerful your spirit can be. You can always fix the technical stuff, but reserve the feeling. And keep that feeling alive in you. Keep that hunger" - Shawn Stockman

I believe this applies to anything in life. Without that struggle, without those hardships, what is there to be grateful for? Everything happens for a reason. & the big guy upstairs? Yeah.. he has a plan for all of us.

ps. THIS is true happiness.

life is what you make of it.

life is short. period.

"life is short, death is long, act accordingly"

& honestly, we hear that all the time. almost everyday. but just recently i'm starting to realize the meaning to it. things are changing. i'm starting to grow into my skin, finally. and yes, i have always been confident in myself and with who i am, but something huge is happening. i'm confident in every way possible. 

i truly believe i am on top of the world and can do anything i desire. it's honestly the greatest feeling i have ever experienced. i am happy with who i am, and i am happy with the people in my life. 

 

 

okay, i'm not trying to fool anyone. yes i have my bad days. where i feel like i could be a little better, or a little skinnier, or maybe even more kind, but that doesn't change that i am who i am. i love my imperfections. others opinions don't really matter to me anymore. sure sure we all say that we don't care what others think, but the truth is, deep down we all do. i can say that i truly don't. i am so proud of the person i am becoming. 

 

 

i can only imagine what the future holds for me. i get so excited when i even think about it!

life is out there just waiting for me to grab hold of it. 

i do have my fears of course. the biggest being losing those that are close to me. for example, in the past year i have lost touch with many friends that i thought would always be there. but this year is going to be the hardest. my best friend is moving in september. is he moving close you might ask? ehhh debatable. if out of the state is close to you. fact is, i will hardly get to see him. but don't get me wrong, i am so extremely excited for him to go out and start his life! my cousin is also leaving, but much sooner. in 48 days to be exact! he joined the marines and leaves for training camp on july 18. i'm dreading july 18 with everything in me. him and i are so close, but what he is doing is very honorable and i respect him so much.

but truly, i am sooo excited for my life. i have great things ahead of me, i just hafta remember to take full advantage of everything. because as bad as i hate it, things constantly change.

and all we have left are the memories.

fatalité.

you can't fight fate. 

that's been my saying lately.

mostly because I'm starting to realize there are certain things I have no control over.
actually, a lot of things.

but everything happens for a reason. you meet people in your life, may even become close with them, but the fact of the matter is that life always moves on. the older we get, the harder we have to work at friendship. we only get to see those people that are important to us every once in a great while. people start to mean more, and visits seem to happen less. i'm slowly learning to deal with this, but it's a hard thing to become used to.

the whole system is backwards to me.

it feels like there isn't a thing i can do. but i can't help but wonder sometimes. everyone that has ever stepped into my life has impacted me in some way. some for the better while others have taught me lessons and mistakes i won't ever repeat. but how come i let the good people slip out of my life? how come so many ties have been broken? when i really start to think about it, it makes me upset with myself. all of those amazing people i just let slip through my life. or those in my life that i have hurt. once it's done it seems it can't be reversed.
things just won't ever be the same.
but i will always have hope.

“Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, 

we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, 

we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us,

nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not all still friends.”

but i will say this. i am extremely grateful for the people in my life right at this moment.
i have no idea where i would be without them.
yeah like i said earlier, as you get older friendship gets harder; but you also learn very quickly who your true friends are. the ones that won't ever hurt you. that won't ever stab you in the back.
the ones that are always there.
& that number might not be as high as you'd like. it's not high school anymore.
only a select few really will always be there.

i am so glad to say that i consider my family my friends.
and i mean my whole family. not just my immediate family.
we're talking about aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, you name it.
& i don't care what you say really. but my family is truly the best out there.
we would do anything for each other. we live at each others houses.
partly because we all live within walking distance. but hey. no matter.

if you know me well enough, you know my family is related in all sorts of weird ways.
so we're naturally closer than most :)
but that doesn't change the fact that i feel blessed to have them. it's such a comforting feeling to know that i can call any single one of them for anything and they'll do it without question. it's just what we do.

we sacrifice for one another.
always have and always will.

you could say at this time in my life i'm up & i'm down.
i'm sad about those i have lost in my life, but i'm so extremely grateful for those i have now.
it's all part of life.
part of learning lessons & growing as an individual.

yes i have made some pretty awful mistakes. but i don't regret them.
i never will.
they have taught me to be a better person. just like all of the people who have stepped into my life.
which i honestly do believe wasn't by accident.
nothing happens by accident.
its all fate.

& you can't fight fate.

2o12.

al·tru·ism  

noun \ˈal-trü-ˌi-zəm\ 

Unselfish concern for the welfare of others; selflessness.

 

On Friday March 11, 2011 disaster hit Japan.

I'm sure you all know what's going on, if not, well then you must be living under a rock.

Just in case you are choosing to live under a rock, I'll tell you.

An earthquake measuring at 8.9 hit Japan and destroyed more than you or I can imagine.

We've all seen the news, the pictures, the stories, & the videos. 

So this got me thinking, what can I do to help?

But the truth is, unless I had 183 Billion dollars, I can't fix it. To be even more honest, I have VERY little money to my name at the moment. But then again, these people aren't looking for money. 

They want help, they want love, they need prayers, they need a place to sleep at night. 

But we should never do service for the credit. That isn't what it is about at all. 

"Anonymity is the truest expression of altruism."

 

Everyone needs to work on this. The idea of doing more for others than you do for yourself.          

  If everyone were like this, the world would be an amazing place to live. 

That's my new goal. At least one random act of kindness each day. I will make it convenient to go out of my way for others.. (if that even makes sense) 

But okay okay... so I'm really intrigued by all of this. I've been reading stories and blogs and discussions and such. This whole natural disaster has got EVERYONE goin nuts about 2012.

It all started with the dang Mayans. 

The Mayans ended their calender on December 21, 2012 they labeled it "doomsday" and circled it  in red. But, there is proof that they had events planned after this so called end of the earth. Nobody quite knows that they thought of the day, or what "doomsday" meant to them, because Spaniards destroyed all of their records. 

The Mayans aren't the only ones though. The list goes on and on.... but I could be here for years writing about all of the theories and facts about 2012. And if it is true, then I would be long gone before I got it all done.

Just go see for yourself: 

http://www.beliefnet.com/Holistic-Living/2009/10/2012-Facts-and-Myths.aspx 

 

People are saying ridiculous things though. Here's the best one yet!

United States lost many lives on 9.11.01
Japan lost many lives on 3.10.11
Add the two dates together and you get 12.21.12

Paranoid much?

So the truth is, nobody truly knows what will happen. It's a mystery to us all. 

But just because there was an earthquake in Japan, doesn't mean 2012 is the end of the world.

 

Let's all take a deep breath.

Now go live your life & stop worrying so much.

 

3o.

           this right here is the whole big "30 day challenge" everyone and their dog is going off about. 

i'm doing it in one day. 

enjoy the pictures!

 

 

                                                                        

A picture of yourself recently

 

 

  

 

bucket list.

i'm officially starting one.

i have all these ideas floating around in my head of things i would like to do before i "kick the bucket"

i say its time to document them.

#1 become better at spanish.

you know, i guess 5 years isn't enough. i'm nowhere near fluent. 

#2 learn how to play the piano.

the only song i know is mary had a little lamb. with one finger. 

#3 ride in a hot air balloon.

#4 wear high heels for a full day.

i'm self consciously tall with weak ankles.

it would be a great accomplishment for me!

#5 travel.

lots & lots & lots.

number one on my travel list? poland.

#6 live by myself.

#7 solve a rubik's cube.

#8 become a better cook.

ask anyone. i'm truly terrible.

#9 learn how to knit.

#10 take as many pictures as i can

i've recently become better at this. it's important to capture the memories!

#11 read every book by Nicholas Sparks

slowly getting there.

#12 allow myself to make mistakes.
nobody is perfect.

#13 run a half marathon.

maybe if i'm feeling it we'll go for a full. highly doubt it.
 

#14 LEARN TO BE DECISIVE

if only if only...
 

#15 have a career i love.
still haven't chosen one for sure.

#16 make a difference in at least one person's life

#17 donate blood.

#18 have an alaskan malamute.

my dad promised to buy me one the day i move out.

#19 get married.

#20 milk a cow.

#21 experience pure bliss. 

someday.

#22 go to see the radio city rockettes christmas show.

in new york. obviously.

#23 try greek food.

#24 take my dad to the redland forest.

he always talks about it.

#25 witness an eclipse.

#26 find my life's passion.

#27 scuba dive.

#28 become an early riser.

#29 see the ice sculptures in maryland.

mainly just concerned about the grinch world.

#30 attend the CMA awards



obviously the list can go on and on.. and i think of new things to add to it everyday.
but this is just a little taste of the life i'll be living in the meantime :)

happiness.

i will be happy.

being happy doesn't just randomly happen. you choose to be happy. 

good days don't happen by chance; the choices you make each day create your happiness.

i'm choosing everyday to find that happiness.

life is too short.

there are sooo many things that make me happy.

the little things in life are the best. period.

if you know me, you know it doesn't take much to make me a happy girl.

#1. compliments.

of any type. even the bad ones. okay i guess i'm saying that opinions in general make me happy. hearing people speak the truth and stand up for what the believe in most definitely makes me happy.

#2. dancing

of any type. makes me happier than anything. it's my passion & it always will be. i may not become some amazing professional dancer in hollywood, but i won't ever quit. never ever give up on your passion. when i'm dancing nothing else matters. it's what i truly love. it picks me up on bad days. even if it's just in my kitchen. 

#3. music

i'm constantly listening to music. i take my stereo in the bathroom when i shower, i play it while i get ready, while i'm doing homework, while i'm cleaning the house, walking to class. you name a time and i'm doin it. taylor swift is my absolute favorite. you better believe i even have posters in my room. never thought i'd see the day. point is, i couldn't live without music.

#4. love

even though i haven't experienced real true love, it makes me happy to even think about. finding someone you want to spend every minute of every day with is amazing. i'm honestly excited for it. but i'm not anxious. i have so much life to live before i want it to happen. but i am truly waiting for my prince charming. just like every other girl out there. if you find him send him my way.

#5. solitude

spending an afternoon alone is so amazing to me. i do it often, and its incredible. so many people always have to be with somebody, always doing something. i am not one of those people. having time to just think about everything is beautiful. it makes me realize how truly beautiful my life is.

#6 vacations

who doesn't love to get away? i haven't been many places, but even little trips make me happy. doesn't matter where it is, if it requires packing a bag for overnight, i couldn't be more excited. someday i'll travel to amazing places. there are so many places on my list i would like to see and experience. 

#7 laughing

enough said.

#8 people

not all people. but most people. the people i choose to surround myself with. i learn from them, grow from them. having somebody care about you is the best feeling to me. trusting someone is pretty high up there on the list too. i trust everyone until they prove me wrong. everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt. 

my family and my friends are the most amazing people i could choose in my life. couldn't ask for more.

#9 food

ohhh yum. personal favorites? hot chocolate with hershey's kisses.

i'm a fan of everything really. except hotdogs & seafood. YUCK.

#10 summer

everything about it. flying kites, picnics, sidewalk chalk, swimming, i could go on and on... 

but you get the point. 

obviously there are so many other things i haven't named. 

being happy is the greatest thing to be. why choose anything else?