lucky.

sometimes i struggle in life. sometimes i'm so hard on myself. 

sometimes i wish things were different; that life was easier. 

then i say to myself..

i am not a perfect person. i constantly have to remind myself of that. i'm hard on myself. and i demand perfection. but lately i'm starting to realize perfection doesn't exist. nobody is perfect. nothing is perfect.

i'm setting a goal for myself. don't try to be perfect, just try to be good. being a good person, making good choices, surrounding myself with good people. 

i've realized with the older i get, the more complicated situations become. what i used to think was a big deal suddenly doesn't matter anymore. i find myself worrying about other things. i just wish the people in my life would do this too. i don't need all the drama. it's like, let's grow up.

i've also realized i'm always trying to please other people. why?? this is something i truly struggle with. 

i worry what other people think. i try to please them, just to be their friend. no longer will i do this.

  i'm living for me from now on. me and only me. a good friend always tells me,

"you worry too much, who cares what they think." it is so unbelievably true.

if you don't like me how i am, then tough luck. because i LOVE me.

i love how i am, including my imperfections. 

 

WISHES.

wishes are truly inspiring to me. we wish for things. constantly wishing, wanting. 

wish where you will. on a star. on an eyelash. perhaps a dandelion. 

maybe when the clock hits a certain time. on your birthday candles.

but why do we wish? because we want to believe little things like this will change our lives.

"my wish for you: comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, love to complete your life"

yesterday i saw something that i won't ever ever forget. it changed me right then and there. i volunteer at primary children's hospital.  just the experience itself is a beautiful thing. it's truly indescribable. i see things that are hard to see, but i also see things that are so inspiring. while i was there last night i came across a wall. it had a giant tree painted in the middle and it said "our wishes for 2010" then people wrote on leaves their wishes and taped them to the wall. no longer will i ever ever feel sorry for myself. to have my health is the greatest gift i could ever ask for. their wishes are a lot different than mine. they wish for a new heart, less medicine, to see their dog, just to go home. reading the wall was truly inspiring to me. i think we all need to be more positive and enjoy life the way we are. i am so lucky.

but this all got me thinking, why do we only wish for ourselves?
ever notice that? we make a wish and its always for us. start wishing for others. today.

ending with one simple thought:

i am so blessed.

i could go on and on... but we'll save that for another day :)